Tuesday, February 21, 2012

More Things I Ponder While The Ushers Are Taking Up The Offering


If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would it be called Fed Up?

Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

What hair color do they put on the drivers licenses of bald men?

If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you
know the batteries are dead?

If the professor on Gilligan’s Island can make a nuclear reactor out of a coconut shell and some palm fronds, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

What happens if someone loses a lost and found box?

How do you throw away a garbage can?

If Americans throw rice at weddings, do the Chinese throw hamburgers?

Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

Aren't all generalizations false?

Could someone ever get addicted to counseling?  If so, how could you treat them?

How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?

How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out"?

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